Телец Не религиозен Не курю Выпиваю в компании с друзьями
Friends call me a Renaissance Man, but I just feel like me. I’m a social as well as economic entrepreneur, an omnivorous reader, passionately dedicated to improving the world (okay, it can annoy at times), and spend a lot of my mental energy on ideas for enterprises that can save or improve lives, principally through empowerment of beneficiaries with strategic provision of some scarce asset, whether tangible or intangible. My omelets are known around the world (because I have a lot of international house guests - but they really are good!).
Writing about who I am feels inauthentic and self-aggrandizing. I hope that by writing about what I do you’ll be able to discern who I am.
I’m attempting to make a contribution to the world, and bit by bit creating a balance between commitment to the world and dedication to my loved ones. I’m raising my daughter Victoria, 16, with joy; we are very close and loving. She lives with me about half time and I never miss her important events. I would welcome other children into my life, including having more, but I’m also satisfied with having just Victoria. My relationship with her mom is friendly and drama-free.
I have a humanitarian/nonprofit philosophy but have found myself in the business sector. I am presently managing two startup companies, one an investment fund focused on climate change mitigation, the other a software that allows citizens to audit their elections in real time and expose attempts to steal votes. I founded two tech companies, one that developed a counter-bomb robot and the other a technology for landmine clearing, and established the TransBorder Institute at the University of San Diego.
I love sailing, hot springs, travel, hiking, music, Mediterranean and Asian food, making things with my hands, fixing things kids ask me to fix. I enjoy what I call terraforming, e.g., creating natural geographies for Zen landscapes where once there was just blah, and building things in wood in Craftsman style. I like yoga but would welcome encouragement and discipline. I attended a 10-day Vipassana retreat and now meditate daily (Victoria likens me to Dumbledore). Two of my civic projects are an open-source website to make appropriate technology designs and plans available to the world without language barriers and a project to help neighborhoods prepare for pandemic flu and other disasters.
I enjoy travel but not tourism per se - I much prefer to do something that brings me into people’s lives, deepening as well as educating myself and making a contribution to them. My zeal can be a bit hazardous: I was arrested in Calcutta for climbing the Hoogly River Bridge to photograph an unusual angle and in El Salvador returning from behind FMLN lines. Nicaraguan President Daniel Ortega personally ordered my arrest in 1985 out of concern that my electoral research could result in an American invasion. (Luckily I’d just left. The government later recognized my work as uniquely valuable and reproduced it for their 1990 election media package.) I regularly host Couchsurfers who bring serendipity into our lives.
I’ve lived in India and Central America, the Philippines and Australia, and traveled Europe - I love Barcelona and Vienna. I’m fluent in Spanish, have middling Portuguese and worse French. I’ve taken courses in Arabic, German, Serbo-Croatian and Hindi/Urdu. I guess I like languages, even though I’m not very good at learning them!
I read constantly and have piles of books around the house. Their genres come in waves. A sample would include the biochemistry of the limbic brain and how it governs our social connections; chaos theory; women and work; history and world system theory; political economy; American empire; poetry; historical fiction; I love reading Robert Service aloud to kids - I read "The Cremation of Sam McGee" to the kids in a second grade class and they were on the edge of their seats.
I have gone through major personal transformations since my divorce in 2004. I took the Landmark Forum after our divorce and saw and acknowledged both my own role and my ex’s sacrifices. This dissolved the anger between us and allowed us to create the tension-free and friendly relationship we have now. Since then I have become far more sensitive to others, much more dedicated to my relationships and to making them work, and conscious of what I had been unconscious of. I would say that my emotional intelligence is now in the high range, though it’s a constant learning. I recently read an interesting book called "The Good Enough Spouse" (an inapposite title, in my opinion). It argues that if we identify the self-defensive "solutions" we created to protect ourselves against feelings of vulnerability during childhood, and recognize how they produce unhealthy defensive behaviors today, we can implement healthy solutions and overcome many of the conflicts in our closest relationships. It’s a provocative theory and I’m finding some value in looking at myself and past relationships through that lens.
I know that I am attracted to confident, successful women, but they don’t have to be "out there" in social struggle. Here are some things I think I’m looking for (I say "think" because I’m still mystified by the contradictions between compatibility and passion).
...You like to share yourself authentically once you get to know someone, and enjoy a good conversation and laughter.
...You are a person with an intellectual or creative streak, a passion for justice, who can be independent even while expecting me to help you. Someone who can challenge me but is also very okay with just being together, quietly or otherwise. Who likes being with me but will tolerate my occasional need to hole up to think and write or go forth to face a challenge.
...You are someone who loves exploring ideas, issues and places, who combines thought with action, who is vulnerable as well as assertive, and sensitive though strong.
...You just feel you might enjoy knowing me, and allowing me to know you.
After first infatuation fades, the chemistry that keeps things going is the excitement of sharing values and passions. My metaphor for a great relationship is a tree that keeps growing, and getting deeper, more multitudinous, and taller. Some of my past lovers are great friends now, and we share deep roots. It would be nice to meet someone to grow deep roots together with.
Update: I am in a relationship now, so I am not looking for a significant other. If you are interested in being friends, given what you now know about me, I would be open to that.
I’m not a regular member at this moment, so if anything here resonates, please write me directly at terrasegura at G m a i l.